Mommy Guilt


I think it is really sad that the only way I can get my almost-4 and 2-year-old sons to get along is to hypnotize them with endless amounts of television viewing. Unlike so many other things I try my best to keep to a minimum, (plastic with BPA, soda, too much juice, sugary snacks, choking hazards, soaps with paraben, too much sun, non-organic foods, etc.) there is irrefutable evidence that too much television viewing has a negative effect on their development and behavior.

But right now, neither one is screaming, biting, hitting or crying and I actually have a few minutes to gather my thoughts before we start the day.

What is usually a nuisance and irritation is magnified this morning by the fact that no one in this house got any sleep last night. You see, Analise is (presumably) teething and sleeping restlessly at best, waking about every two hours.

Nicolas, having been sick all weekend, was spoiled by having practically undivided attention from Mommy and getting to sleep in a variety of unconventional places. As a result, he has taken to screaming when put to sleep in his bed and is waking several times at night to moan"out of here!" So, when Analise doesn't wake on her own, she wakes right after we get Nicolas settled down.

Lucas slept the whole night, but with the circus of his siblings' rotating wakings, he clearly didn't get any good sleep. With the slightest inconvenience he melts into a sobbing puddle. Add to that the fact that he spent a wonderful weekend at Grandma's house getting to do big boy things without the distraction of little brother and sister, and his readjustment is less than stellar.

And I'm sure I'm not helping things, what with the magnificent patience and love I exude on almost zero sleep.

So, my kids are mesmerized by that box with flashing colored lights. At least I comfort myself that they are watching Sid the Science Kid, Super Why and Sesame Street. They really do learn a lot from those shows ...

At least that's what I'm telling myself today.

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